If we can only save a few weeks of the CFB schedule, which should they be?
Welcome to The Slant. Let's pretend for a second that we're actually going to have a college football season.
What is this? Welcome to The Slant, my newsletter about college sports. This is the very first edition, and I’m super excited about it. You can expect 2-3 editions per week, right in your inbox.
Why does this exist? I explain this more at the welcome post, but the tl;dr is I’ve been furloughed from my day job on the social media team at U.S. News & World Report, and this newsletter should help me do something that’s productive while I pass the time and a fun hobby once I either find a new job or get recalled to my old one.
A fun ritual for me during the past few summers has been to pull up FBSchedules.com and refresh myself on what’s to come in the first couple weeks of the college football season. It’s been a nice reminder that we have a lot to look forward to, and that I should be going outside on Saturdays while I still have the chance.
Things are uhhh a bit different now. In these uncertain times, I’d give anything to be reading a college football preview magazine while I ride the metro to work. Instead, I’m typing up a newsletter about sports in the middle of a weekday while I wait to hear back about unemployment benefits.
So let’s play a game. Let’s pretend we get word there will in fact be a college football season*. But here’s the problem: we’re going to have to cut some weeks out. There’s only space for, let’s say, six weeks of games. And we’re on the committee that determines which of these weeks should be played and which ones will never see the light of day.
*I think there probably won’t be a season in 2020. I find it easier to take the route of giving up now and maybe getting surprised later instead of holding out hope and then getting crushed, but do whatever suits you.
The rules: we can only look at the top six games of the week, at least one of those games must include a Group of 5 team, and let’s try to spread the love around, conference-wise, as much as we can.
Here we go!
Let’s just toss this one before we get serious. Week 0 is never good. I guess Navy-Notre Dame is the headliner? That’s fine when we’ve been starved all offseason and have so much to look forward to for the rest of the season. But no one’s choosing this week over any other one on the schedule.
The verdict: ELIMINATE
At first, I almost didn’t realize this week was trash. Week 1 is usually great! There’s football Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday! But take a closer look at the games, and this is an easy pass. Even if (*IF*) USC-Alabama is entertaining, there’s not much after that, though we can pour one out for Oregon vs. North Dakota State. Do not schedule North Dakota State.
Verdict: ELIMINATE
LSU vs. Texas and Ohio State vs. Oregon are about as good as it gets for nonconference matchups. Penn State vs. Virginia Tech and UNC vs. Auburn are the kind of game we should encourage programs to set up.
The verdict: KEEP.
Georgia-Alabama is the kind of top-5 matchup that could be good enough to sustain a bad week by itself. App State-Wisconsin is fun because either App State exposes the Badgers again or we get to see Wisconsin beat a good team that isn’t in its own division. And Houston-Memphis is the fun kind of G5 game that has a pregame total of 84 and still hits the over. Still, not a particularly deep week.
The verdict: Too light. ELIMINATE.
Even another edition of the time Army almost beat Oklahoma and everyone watched it on an illegal stream where the host kept showing everyone his feet wouldn’t be able to save this week.
The verdict: ELIMINATED
Penn State vs. Michigan is a fine headliner, and this week could actually have some legs. Alabama-Ole Miss could be fun to watch for like 5 minutes to see what Lane Kiffin vs. Nick Saban is like. Washington-Oregon is a solid Pac-12 matchup, and Notre Dame-Wisconsin is certainly a football game between two teams the computers like very much.
The verdict: I think I’ll keep this one, at least for now, but I might already be regretting it.
Red River, LSU-Florida and Auburn-Georgia give this week more firepower than most, and some fun matchups a little lower on the card add some nice depth. This looks to be one of the best weeks of the season.
The verdict: KEEP
Did I just put Cal on there? Oh no.
The verdict: Ew, eliminate
Ohio State-Penn State has routinely been one of the biggest games each of the last few seasons, and PSU could have its best team of the James Franklin era. The depth isn’t amazing this week, but some points from Oklahoma vs. OSU and Alabama-Tennessee maybe could be interesting enough, maybe.
The verdict: KEEP
All college football weekends are good. Not much to be said about this one though. The Cocktail Party will have to wait.
The verdict: Nope.
A rare chance to see Clemson play an actual good team. LSU-Alabama is probably an auto-keep, though LSU’s likely rebuild gives me pause there. USC-Oregon could be a big factor in the Pac 12 and even Playoff race if the Trojans actually have everything together.
The verdict: KEEP
🤢
Verdict: ELIMINATE
LSU-Auburn and Texas A&M-Alabama are nice, obviously, but almost nothing behind those is enough. The verdict: ELIMINATE
Rivalry week is an easy one. Verdict: KEEP.
What do we do with Army Navy, which is played after conference championship games?
Listing Army-Navy among the other weeks that are full of football games seems weird. In this imaginary scenario, let’s agree we can find a time and place to Support The Troops.
Here’s your abbreviated college football season!
Let’s take this even further.
What if we can only play *two* weeks? If you’ve made it this far, we’re already deep into an imaginary scenario anyway. Let’s pencil in Rivalry Week as one of the two weeks. Which should the other be?
Hey, you should follow The Slant on Instagram. I’m going to do some fun/very dumb stuff there.
Representing the entire sport of college football is a fool’s errand here. If I offended your team, please accept my deepest condolences.
If you enjoyed the first edition of The Slant, I hope you’ll tell a friend.
Feedback? Questions? Story ideas? You can reach me at ryanmconnors11@gmail.com or @RyanConnors_ on Twitter.